Arhiva eticheta: relationships

Never Starts Today

Foto: istockphoto

People have this ingrained tendency of going through life labeling things according to their wishful thinking. I WILL NEVER wear something like this, I COULD NEVER marry someone like that, I COULD NEVER be single for so much time, I WILL NEVER change my style and so on.

How much firmness and stubbornness for the inhabitants of a society that is promoting a lack of decidedness that can lead to panic attacks even when faced with a decision between a white and a beige shirt at the GAP. However, we don’t even blink when we utter sentences about the course of our entire life, a life that we are most of the times unable to fully keep under control and manage in „present” tense, let alone in „future”.

In my time, I stated quite a few „sentences” of my own that I religiously abided by and believed from the bottom of my naive heart. Some of the first that come to my mind are related to never wearing leopard print on anything, getting married before 25, never being single for more than two months (God was I childish), never eating strawberries after convincing myself of a purported allergy, never eating raw food and so on. Of course, now that I’m 24, single, eating at least a handful of strawberries daily, going to sushi every other day and being absolutely indifferent, bitchy and bad girl with men from the height of my brand new D&G leopard print boots, I can no longer show the same firmness with respect to my former life guidelines. I can, however, clearly state that people DO change.

We always complain about the bad things that happen to us, about the unjust suffering that life has in store for us, about the way our talents are not fully appreciated, about the way we are single and we shouldn’t be. Nonetheless, if we didn’t have the hard way of learning things, would we ever bother to learn anything the soft way? Have you ever heard of a writer who got inspired to write the bestseller of his life when he was walking his dog, hand in hand with his lovely wife, on the sunny alleys of their Surrey domain? Of a poet who wrote his finest poem when he was rich, married and successful? If you know of such people, please introduce them to me immediately, because I need the phone numbers of other people they might know, such as Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy.

The fact is…inspiration comes with pain. Success comes with effort and sweat. Is there anything in this life that comes when you’re simply clapping your hands? It would be beautiful, but it’s too far fetched. Interestingly enough, I’ve chased away the „never”s in my life exactly when I was more sure of their validity and I changed in the moment that I least expected to do so. I changed in the moments in which I was most reluctant and even most fragile to do it and…guess what, I survived. And, along the way, I learned that it pays off to be the bad girl you once thought you could never be and that leopard print can actually look sophisticated if matched with good taste.

So what can I say…give me sushi, leopard print, bubble dresses… And as for love, just give me the strength of wishing rather than needing it…

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